Coney Island, April 10, 2017. Built 2014
- Girls Season 5
April 8-10. Originally aired on HBO in 2014
I stopped watching GIRLS during season 2. Season 1 had entertained me, but when I watched it again, the only thing that held up was Jemima Kirke. Season 2 features way to much Hannah, the least tolerable and least interesting of the characters; I couldn’t stand to watch her, and abandoned the show. Sarisky posted something about Adam Driver on Facebook, which made me think of how much I enjoyed him as Kylo Ren. It took Adam Driver to make Star Wars sexy, but he did it. Even Han Solo and Princess Leia’s scoundrel flirtation never had a lot of sexual tension, unlike the interaction between Rey and Kylo Ren.
So there I am in Kensington, dogsitting a puddle of pugs, and decided to try out GIRLS again, going back as far as their TV did: season 5. I don’t know what the fuck is going on, but the beautiful one, Marni, is getting married to some psycho singer-songwriter type and all the girls are wearing horrible Nadia Tarr dresses at their worst. Too perfect. But Adam Driver? I know the show is about girls. But does Lena Dunham hate girls? Because a lot of what is best of this show goes to Adam Driver. I don’t think sexy things are sexy almost ever. I don’t think a single scene of Game of Thrones is sexy; I think the whole thing feels like vomitus rape scenes, except for Igret, “you know nothing Jon Snow” and Jon Snow, and it’s a load of bullshit, too. Why would he live if not to love her? Anyway Jemima Kirk always provided the only watchable moments of Girls. She doesn’t fail in season Five. And Adam Scott. Just the right amount of psycho and sexy and loving and good at talking. Are there those guys? I’ve known them. I have.
Oh and the fucking Michael Penn soundtrack? White girl dance music for days. can not stop listening to the spotify playlist. So great.
(photo credits: NYTimes and HBO.)
So here’s a confession: as much as I love Buffy the Vampire Slayer, I almost only watch season 2 or season 3. Sometimes it’s on reruns and I’ll watch whatever, and of course I’ll watch, “Once More with Feeling,” any fucking time—like maybe right now instead of writing this—but I have only seen season 7 once. One time. I’ve seen season 3 so many times that I can say the words along with it like I’m watching Star Wars. So when I was coming home from the fucked up Japanese movie (more about that later) wondering if I should go back to watch the horrendous CBS show (more about that later, too.) and Alex at FD said, she was just going to go home and watch Buffy I envied her, but I also thought, I ALWAYS watch Buffy. I need to watch something new. Jerkpatrick said he was going to rewatch season 5 I thought, WHAT?
Season 5 was originally on in 1999, so when I still lived in San Francisco and maybe videotaped it, but it was so annoying, it’s possible I didn’t even watch the episodes as they were aired because Dawn was so horrible. I don’t even remember when I stopped recording it. I mean, buying DVD seasons didn’t become a thing until the mid aughts.
I mean season Six, when Buffy comes back from the dead is better than season Four “College is so hard” season.
Who watches season Five? Isn’t that when gross little Dawn shows up? YUUUUUck. Could they have made her more ehlthdh? I don’t know how to express my distain for adding a whiney little annoying thing to Buffy. Sure, they had Cordelia. But Cordelia never was stupid or a whiner. The character was well written, bratty and intentionally shallow. Meant to represent the person that Buffy would have been had she not be cursed to be the slayer. She wouldn’t have been chilling with the likes of Xander or Willow if she could still have been prom queen or a cheerleader. But because she was a weirdo who needed some help—which she does always need from Willow, less often from Xander, but also from Angel and Giles, and we are to understand the reason she is so successful as the slayer, more than any other girl before her—she doesn’t die at sixteen like most slayers because of her friends. But if Dawn had showed up before season 4 NO ONE would have watched this shit. I mean talk about ruining a perfectly good show. Anyway. This isn’t about Season 4 at all, this is about HOW COME NO ONE LEARNS FROM EVERYONE ELSE’S MISTAKES. Really? Bringing on a young person worked so fucking well for Family Ties and Growing Pains and every other fucking show that has done it. And for god’s sake, she’s the same age as they were when the show started, can they stop treating her like she’s four? And can the character stop being written that way?